Steve Ballmer announced today that he is the new king of earth, and that free software should be burned, "just like we do with banned books and naughty children." 

"Look... its like Rock, Paper, Scissors - Noone really knows -WHY- paper beats rock, they just know it does. That's what I'm trying to tell you.. we're paper. We win. Plus, I have several very large fishing boats, a fleet of porsches, and an army of midgets that clean my mansions. If i'm wrong about this, then how did I get to be so rich?"

Ballmer is saying that Microsoft can lay claim to over 200 cases where technology patents cover techniques and implementations that exist in free software.  The one thing he may not have thought of is... if it's free, GPL'd software, who can Microsoft sue to enforce the patents? Penniless programmers? Nice work baldy.

The reasons for this completely inane announcement are fairly clear:

1. Microsoft knows that google's backend infrastructure is comprised of a significant portion of free software. They think they might have some level of injunction capability here.
2. Steve Ballmer wants to prove to the public that he is more evil than Dick Cheney.